Running a Business After Losing Your Mum...
- info8469062
- Mar 31
- 4 min read
Losing my mum has been one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. Some days I feel numb, other days the emotions take over completely and others still I cannot be bothered to do a thing! And amidst this emotional storm, life keeps moving.
Emails need answering, shoots need scheduling, clients expect high-quality work, and deadlines don't pause for my pain.
As a self-employed photographer, I had the privilege of being able to be there for my mum at what seemed like endless appointments, hours in and out of hospital, high alerts for machines beeping and not beeping, taking zoom calls in hospital corridors, editing at 3am on a busy ward - you name it, I've lived and survived it. Legit, spent 12 hours in A&E over night with mum before she got admitted onto a ward and at 10am the next morning, I had to find a clean and somewhat quiet corridor to take a client call for a shoot that was happening in 3 days. I could not rearrange the meeting and it was one of the maddest moments of my life! Really fake it till you make it type of scenario!
The harsh reality is when you run your own business, you still have to show up—even when your heart isn’t in it. And this has and still is the hardest bit of dealing with my new normal.
Getting Back Into Work After a Bereavement
I can't lie, this has not been a smooth transition and I'm still trying to navigate it. I certainly don't have my usual spark for work and things that used to be a good challenge for me now seem like huge mountains I don't want to entertain let alone prepare to climb.
At times you can feel like you're putting on a brave face, especially when things were fresh; and that is unbelievably draining. What helped to overcome this was remembering that the work I do matters to my clients. Their branding, events, and memories deserved my full attention, and I'm learning to balance honouring my emotions while still delivering what they expect. And really it's about taking each moment as it comes.
My first job after mum's passing was delivering a business introduction workshop to ten 15 year olds for @TheRebelSchool. Being professional when you don't feel like it, is tough. Bills keep billing and don't care about your situation so you gotta face the music so to speak. Being professional doesn’t mean suppressing your emotions—it means acknowledging them, giving yourself grace, and still showing up the best you can. And I absolutely loved the workshop, it reminded me I was in the right place regardless, which actually gave me a really positive boost.
The Power of Staying Positive (Even When It's Hard)
Staying positive doesn't mean pretending everything is okay. It meant finding small wins during the day—whether it was making lunch, editing for an hour, taking a nap or simple things like brushing my hair and teeth, washing clothes etc. Only those who have been in a situation like this will understand.
Positivity is a choice. It’s about recognising that even on hard days, there’s still something worth appreciating. So write a gratitude list, do something you'd enjoy, go for a walk, play video games etc. A few times I literally did not move from the sofa and binge watched Lost (if you can believe that) and ate snacks all day.
I'll be sharing a series of content whether in a blog/vlog or social media relating to this subject matter because I think it's a really important area to talk about and how to actually and practically deal with it.
10 Tips for Entrepreneurs Balancing Grief and Business
♥️ Be honest with yourself - don't try to force yourself to do or be anything you're not ready for.
♥️ Listen to your body - if you need to rest, take a nap, binge social media for a bit, watch a movie etc go do it. Just do not get consumed by it. Taking more breaks than you usually would can help not to overwhelm your mind and body. Note: You're NOT being lazy or unproductive!
♥️ Be honest with clients - they will be more understanding than you think, just be practical and not overwhelming yourself with loads of deadlines at one time.
♥️ Allow yourself to grieve when the feeling takes you.
♥️ Take each day as it comes - in terms of doing tasks you know you need to do but you're not enthusiastic to do them - set yourself 3 things you have to complete a day until you're ready to do more. (Again be realistic)
♥️ Plan activities around a 20-30min limit. If you're like me, the momentum to start something was difficult but by setting myself a 20-30min limit of the task usually meant I'd start something, get into it and finish it or pick it back up later. Makes tasks more manageable.
♥️ Don't forget to eat!
♥️ Seek professional support (I'm in the process of this) - I cannot be my full self without it and learning how to adjust.
♥️ Spend time with and message friends - they will be a life line and I cannot thank my friends for their immense support during this difficult time!
♥️It's ok to not show up 100% AND to not put yourself down during this time.
If you’re going through something similar, be kind to yourself and I'm here if you ever want to talk! You’ve got this. ♥️
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